Fic - Photographs - Rimmer/Lister - G

[comedy-waltz.livejournal.com]

I'm brand new to this whole livejournal thing and as a result, this community. I never knew there were others out there who shared my love of Rimmer/Lister goodness. Most people just stare at me like I've grown an extra head. I'm looking forward to reading all the other fics posted here and getting to know some of my fellow Dwarf-lovers.

I wrote this story about six years ago now, when after loving Red Dwarf throughout my childhood I suddenly realised how completely slashy the show was. I've been a dedicated Rimmer/Lister fan ever since. I've written quite a few Rimmer/Lister fics since then, including one sprawling epic, but this one has always had a special place in my heart.

Title: Photographs
Author: comedy_waltz
Pairing: Rimmer/Lister
Rating: G
Summary: Rimmer spreads the photographs out on the table and sighs. His entire life can be mapped out by a meagre five photographs.
Disclaimer: In my mind, Red Dwarf is just one of the many wonderful things I own. In reality, Red Dwarf owns me.

Photographs

Rimmer spreads the photographs out on the table and sighs. His entire life can be mapped out by a meagre five photographs. He picks up the first photograph and studies it carefully, memorising the expressions on the faces.

 

It’s a picture of him just minutes after he was born. His mother, exhausted but happy, cradles the young Arnold in her arms while his father looks on, a forced smile on his face and thinly veiled contempt in his eyes. BabyArnold’s eyes are wide open, taking in the exciting new world into which he has been born.

 

Rimmer sighs again. Had he known then the heartbreak and misery that the world would bring him he would have strangled himself with his own umbilical cord. Instead he was forced to carry on; to live each day in a world that was determined never to give him a break.

 

The second photograph was taken a few years later. It’s a picture of his family. His parents had decided that a family portrait was in order and they had forked out a large amount of cash to have one done professionally. The picture looks perfect. Everyone is dressed in their finest clothes and Rimmer remembered his mother going out early in the morning to have her hair and nails done. His parents stand, proud and immaculately dressed, in the middle of the picture, all respectability and middle-class restraint. Rimmer’s brothers stand either side, dressed in their Academy uniforms and smiling their perfect, white-toothed smiles. Rimmer isn’t in the photograph.

 

He throws the picture down with a snarl. Rimmer knows he’s not the nicest man in existence, not even close, but even he can’t fathom how anyone could be so heartless to their own child. Rimmer remembers the bruises his brothers gave him later that day when he dared to ask why he hadn’t been included. He can hear his mother’s voice telling him quite simply that they didn’t want him in the picture. He can see his father’s face, contorted in disgust as he berated the four year old Arnold for his laziness, his stupidity and his ugliness. He remembers crying himself to sleep and wishing for the day when he could leave his family behind.

 

The third picture was taken the day Rimmer joined the crew of Red Dwarf. Every crew member had to have their photograph taken to go in their file. Rimmer’s photograph captures the essence of the man. His uniform is spotless and pressed so sharply you could cut yourself if you ran a finger along one of the creases. His hair is flattened to his head with almost half a tub of gel. His parting is severe and carefully measured. His boots are polished and the reflection from them almost blinds the camera man. Rimmer stares straight at the camera and his expression is one of grim determination. In his eyes there is a spark of hope, a sense that this is the beginning of a whole new life.

 

That picture is almost too painful to look at now. All Rimmer sees now is a poor, misguided fool, desperate for the chance to prove himself yet scared shitless that given that chance, he’d probably fail. And fail he did, many times. Rimmer never moved above the second technician rank at which he’d entered the Space Corps. He never received so much as a word of encouragement or a friendly smile from any of the officers. His one sexual experience with McGruder was hardly something to boast about and the entire crew made no secret of the fact that they thought he was a complete and utter smeghead. He was a failure in every sense of the word.

 

The forth picture makes him feel even worse. It was taken just days before Lister went into stasis at one of the many parties the crew had thrown back then. Rimmer had taken a night off from his astronavigation revision and was currently telling some story to a group of people who were clearly not at all interested in what he was saying. In the background Lister is entertaining Chen, Peterson and Selby by doing what appears to be a rather crude impersonation of Rimmer. Lister’s disdain for his roommate practically radiates off the page and Rimmer tears his eyes away.

 

He’d felt so optimistic when Lister had joined the crew and he’d finally got a roommate. He was determined to be friendly and helpful and polite and hopefully he’d make his first real friend out of it. Lister had only been in the room five minutes when Rimmer had snapped at him for doing something, probably humming, and the fighting began. Lister had made some remark about Rimmer being uptight, Rimmer had called Lister a git and thus their relationship began.

 

Rimmer picks up the fifth and final picture and allows a small smile to grace his face. Kryten had taken this picture just a few days earlier. Lister had insisted on having a Christmas party even though there was only the four of them on board and absolutely nothing that resembled Christmas decorations. They’d gone along with it anyway and spent a night getting drunk and telling outrageous stories. Lister was obviously in the middle of one of his stories when the picture was taken. Rimmer was leaning slightly against Lister, who had one arm slung around the hologram. Neither Rimmer nor Lister was looking at the camera and both men looked like they’d had a little too much to drink. Lister’s face was buried in Rimmer’s shoulder and both of their faces were crumpled with laughter.

 

Their relationship isn’t perfect. The time they’ve spent together in recent years has bonded them in a way they never could have imagined but they still annoy the hell out of each other. The times when they don’t get on far outnumber the times when they do. They still trade insults and pull pranks on each other but the insults are more out of habit than anything else and the pranks lack the viciousness they once held. They’ve been through a lot together – diced with death, discovered new things about themselves and hopefully become better people as a result. Rimmer knows they’ve both done and said things that they regret, but he doesn’t like to dwell on them too much. Back on Red Dwarf he would never have allowed himself to get so close to Lister or to laugh with him like an old friend. But things have changed since then and at the end of the day, Rimmer has a grudging respect and affection for his roommate.

 

Sometimes he allows himself to believe that Lister feels the same about him.

Comments

[shivvlan.livejournal.com]

Hey, nice fik. Short and sweet. Gives one a nice WaFF-y feeling right there at the end.

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

Welcome!

Baby Arnold’s eyes are wide open, taking in the exciting new world into which he has been born.
Oh, the forshadowing! Nicely written.

all respectability and middle-class restraint.
*shudders*

Oh gods... The crew photo broke my heart. Poor Arn...

In the background Lister is entertaining Chen, Peterson and Selby by doing what appears to be a rather crude impersonation of Rimmer.
*smacks Dave* He knows better.

Rimmer was leaning slightly against Lister, who had one arm slung around the hologram. Neither Rimmer nor Lister was looking at the camera and both men looked like they’d had a little too much to drink. Lister’s face was buried in Rimmer’s shoulder and both of their faces were crumpled with laughter.
*melts*

Well done! More please!

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

Oh, very sweet! Great leadup of the sadness of the first four to the hope of the last. Welcome, and that's a very good introduction! ;)

I have some persnickety concrit - email me if you want it.