Fiction: Standards. Rimmer/Lister

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

Title: Standards.
Authors: kahvi and roadstergal.
Pairing: Rimmer/Lister.
Rating: PG (for this first part).
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, we neither own the characters nor look to make any money from this. Grant/Naylor does both.
Spoilers: Thanks For The Memory, Marooned, Bodyswap, Quarantine, Terrorform, Legion, Emohawk.
Notes: Takes place between Tikka To Ride and Stoke Me A Clipper.

Yes, another gestalt fic. We shamelessly took over Holodonkeh's LJ for a bit of cyberporn, and then realized it would become a fic if we, well, added a plot. Since this takes place in VII, we got to use jealousbitch!Kryten. This is Part 1.

It seemed to irritate Kryten to have him sharing a room with Lister again, though, and that was worth an uncomfortable silence every now and then.

Comments

[jargonelle.livejournal.com]

See! Look! Hyperproductivity! It took me ten days to write a thousand words... But it's all good because there's more lovely stuff to read!

A party of two means half the chance of getting unexpectedly shot. - Hee!

"Rimmer, I'm not a smegging magpie!" :)

Kryten did not look in the least bit happy with this arrangement. "Sir, are you sure that's a good idea?" He eyed Rimmer, his Visual Expression Emulator in Suspicion Mode. - :D

"Lister, that sign is the universal symbol for 'biohazard.' It is not the universal symbol for 'tasty and delightful things within.'" - The 'within' on the end just makes that line. Wonderful.

Lister crossed his arms as best he could in the bulky suit, waiting for Rimmer's hopefully amusing reaction. - oh, you so would, wouldn't you? Brilliant.

I look forward to the next part!

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

I think the P word you're looking for in my case is Procrastination, not Productivity. ;)

But yes, it's hard to talk with Kahvi and not get a fic out of it! ;)

The lab scene is the one that's probably had the most re-writing of any scene we've done together, so I'm glad you like it!

Oh, the next part is the good bit. Well, I think. Thanks for the comments!

[jargonelle.livejournal.com]

Writing always counts as productivity. Staring at the screen blankly... not really.

Oh, the next part is the good bit. Well, I think. - I'll take your word at that and have high expectations then! :)

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I'm telling you, it's like magic. We start talking, and BOOM - suddenly there's twenty-odd pages of porn story. If only we could use our powers for good, and not just awesome... ;)

The magpie line was a late addition of mine; glad to see it was enjoyed!

And I love the "tasty and delightful things within" line too; made me giggle.

Next part will be up tomorrow, come rain or shine! :D

[lady-draco.livejournal.com]

Ahhh. The beginning of my hijacked post. =)

Loved the bickering, loved the Rimmer cowardice, loved the Lister "Oooh! Fun!", got a little irritated by the Kryten jealousy (which I presume was the point) - all up, love, love, love. Hehe.

Love your work, guys. Love it! Hee. Well done, dearies.

There's a lot of love in this comment. *grins*

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

Thanks muchly! You were irritated; consider how Lister felt! ;)
*feels the love*

Next up is the poooorrrnnn... ;D

[lady-draco.livejournal.com]

If I could castrate Kryten, I would.

Wahey! Porn!!! *eyes light up* First thing tomorrow, eh? (Well for me anyway) ... What a wonderful wake up call.

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

"Lister?" *snorts* "What about me?"

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

"What about you?" *leers*

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

*shakes head* "One-track mind." *cracks sore back*

[lady-draco.livejournal.com]

*snorts*

You're going to end up hijacking your own post now.

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

*points at Lister* "It's all his fault." *crosses hands in front of crotch (http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e204/holodonkeh/Blue/blue3.jpg)*

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

*throws feet on table*
"That's what you always say, man. Don't make it any more right."
*eyes hands*
"And ye can stop that, I'm not going to run away with yer trouser tent." *winks*

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

*adjusts H* "Well. It's not easy having a hard-on..." *pauses, frowns* "..when you're dead."

*dies laughing*

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

*wide-eyed, incredolous stare*

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

*Looks at Lister with suspicion.* "And don't tell me to have the skutters help me." *Disniff* "I wouldn't let them near it even if they were here."

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

"Rimmer, have you been at the marijuana gin again?"

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

"I think I've gone a bit peculiar, to tell you the truth." *pause* "And it's all your fault."

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

"I swear, if this is going into a song-and-dance routine..."

*backs slowly away*

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

*tosses top hat aside* "I try to entertain, god knows I try..."

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

Aww, I'm feeling the love! *snuggle*

[beetle-breath.livejournal.com]

I ca't wait for more!

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

Hurrah! More to come this time tomorrow! ;)

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

Oh, please do, though! It won't be long! :)

[shivvlan.livejournal.com]

Brilliant! You two really do portray the charactors quite well. And, once again, plot. I'm rather enamored of plot.

[roadstergal.livejournal.com]

Hee! Yes, we liked this show to start with because of the plot, so it's the least we can do for a fanfic...

Thanks!

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

Thank you! And ya gotta have plot. No plot, no porn, IMO! ;)