[identity profile] roadstergal.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] reddwarfslash
A fic set in a AU where the hallucination in Back To Reality was reality. This is a bit of a thought experiment - poking at how characters with fundamentals of the four folk might have ended up where they did when they 'emerged from the game.' Crit very welcome.

"It's a little late for traffic concerns, innit?"

Date: 2006-10-01 01:18 am (UTC)
ext_3665: (Fascinating)
From: [identity profile] zekkass.livejournal.com
Wha-hey! What a fascinating take on the alt. reality, and I love the little details - the unable-to-recognize Jake, Tranquilizer of the people, etc. I never took Billy Doyle as a drinker, but it matches his clothing.

..You've been reading 1984, haven't you? ;D

Date: 2006-10-01 08:24 pm (UTC)
ext_3665: (fandom RD)
From: [identity profile] zekkass.livejournal.com
I'll have to pick up Brave New World and We, then. Have you read these (http://www.mannazone.org/zone/admin/index.html)? They were my major inspiration for my own Doyle piece.

I don't remember, either, but I'll bet Rimmer called him that during his rant, before he knew who he was...;)

Date: 2006-10-01 08:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eviltigerlily.livejournal.com
We is great. Mathematical metaphores, how can you not love that? Although I don't know what the translation is like. I know Orwell was influenced by it when he wrote 1984, though.

Date: 2006-10-01 04:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tawg.livejournal.com
I really like the way you've established the dystopia in just two short scenes. The way you established Sebastian's character was very efficient - I imagine it would be easy to over-describe his environment, but you've built on what was presented in BTR very smoothly.

I also really liked the justification for Sebastian's work - the ep never really covered the severity of the offences that people who are altered have committed.

Date: 2006-10-01 11:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eviltigerlily.livejournal.com
Facinating. Can't wait for the rest of it.

He was no casual killer; what he did, he did to make far more people safe than were harmed by the doings of his department

Eeep. That's chilling. The sign of a true killer in a totaletarian society. He actually thinks he's doing good. *shudder*

Tranquilizer of the People

Is it avaliable around here?

Official Established Truths

Very nice touch for the creepy society. Yes, they must have had something like this *trys hard to ignore the program about Stalin going on in the background*. I love the whole presentation scene. And the new directives, also very fitting. Sexism - another sure sign of a totaleterian society.

Date: 2006-10-01 02:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] iris-summers.livejournal.com
*sneaking out from the shadows of lurkerdom*

Great exploration of the AU. I love how you're delving into the universe of Back To Reality, and the little details of how Sebastian couldn't quite recognize Jake, his sort of grudging consideration about Billy, his half-brother, his self-justification about the work he does, etc. It's a very believable 1984-ish society that you've portrayed. Definitely hoping that you'll expand further on this fic. Cheers!

Date: 2006-10-04 03:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kahvi.livejournal.com
*unconvincing mobster* "Looks like you've got yerself a nice little dystopia here, Mr Doyle! All-powerful state, oppressive, repressive laws; got some nice propaganda in there too. Very bleak, very Orwellian. I like a nice Orwellian set-up. My cousin Louie over there though, he don't like dystopias. Say they're too 'indicative of a general pessimissm about the human condition by predicting the eventual breakdown of modern civilization into pseudo-fascist dictatorships.'" *shrugs* "Me? I disagree. But what can you do. I certainly can't stop Louie from expressing his opinion - if you know what I mean. Shame if something were to happen to this set up. I'm sure we understand one another."

Um... I don't quite know where I was going with that. Sorry. I'm in a weird mood. And now for something completely different:

This is the one you were telling me about, then? I like it! I think you've done a good job of making sense of a world that was not nessecarily supposed to make sense, being as it was set up to torment the dwarfers as much as possible. The characters seem more like dimensional alternates than the templates suggested in the episode, but that is a natural concequence of what I mentioned above, and I like the results.

The doorbell was a very nice touch.

Shrieks emerged from the living room shortly after she went off to do so, and Sebastian sent the butler in after her.
Some great scene-setting there - so much said in so few words.

Sebastian's character is very well done, I think. It's a Lister-alternate who grew up in a totalitarian state. It makes so much sense. With a lifetime of brainwashing, a Lister-type would want the kind of job Sebastian has, because he's been conditioned to think it is for the good of society. And yet, he would have lingering doubts that something is wrong, exactly as Sebastian does. He constantly needs to reassure himself that what he is doing is - indeed - right. But he knows it isn't, deep inside.

Loved the "-of the people" inserts, "Tranquilizer of the People" in particular. Good stuff.

Readers of porn, eh? But writing it is fine... Right? Hell, I'm screwed anyway. Except not, because that's probably illegal too. ;)

*hurries home to read the next bit*


Date: 2006-10-04 05:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kahvi.livejournal.com
"Altered by Lister".. It sounds kinda sexy when you put it like that, but yeah. I like my dead/alive state set firmly to "alive", thank you.

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