Fic: Weaknesses: PG-13
May. 18th, 2008 04:21 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
hazeltea.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
reddwarfslashTitle: Weaknesses
Pairing: Lister/Rimmer
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own Red Dwarf, and I do not profit from this. I just do this to amuse myself.
This comes after the following:
Function
Static
Love
Release
Reunited
Byway
Rimmer felt the familiar gnawing in the pit of his stomach, the quickening of his pulse as he broke into a cold sweat. Whatever was in that noxious wall of mist was far worse than the memories he’d repressed, it was the potential of the worst case scenario, the fear of the unknown, Murphy’s Law laid out before them in a great, stinking barricade.
Sir, when you died you were recreated as a hologram and your exact personality was refined to an algorithm and duplicated electronically. If that algorithm contained a flaw, that flaw would be duplicated also.
Rimmer sunk to his knees, shaking. He couldn’t run. If there was one hard lesson he’d learnt throughout his existence, it was that you couldn’t run away from yourself, no matter how desperately you tried.
Kryten, I don't want the others to know about this. I want you to behave as if everything's absolutely normal.
“Rimmer, you okay, man?” Lister knelt beside him, placing a hand on his shoulder.
Rimmer raised his eyes from the crook of his elbow and took a shuddering breath. His face was red and his breath was ragged. “Don’t. Just… don’t.” he stood up, his legs shaky. “We can’t go this way, that’s for sure. Better retrace our steps and formulate a plan.”
It's not common, but it's possible for a hologram to die.
Lister drew back his hand, reluctantly. “We got no choice.” He said, turning to unsuccessfully meet Rimmer’s eyes, which darted from his gaze. “It’s forwards or back at this point. I don’t like the looks of that thing any more than you do, but we’ve got to get through this. We’ll crack the coding and figure out what’s gone wrong.”
Rimmer clenched his fists. “You can’t just fix or debug me or whatever it is you have in mind, you know. It’s more complicated than that.”
Lister regarded him with those deep, soulful eyes, as though he understood. Goit. “I know, I know.” He began. “Since I… since you’ve been gone, see, I spent all my time learning whatever I could about holograms. I think I can figure it out if I give it time-“
“It’s part of me.” Rimmer said, tensely. “Since I was alive, and it’s part of my core programming. There’s nothing to figure out, so we can stop investigating this particular course of action right now. Isn’t there some other way around it?” His entire body was vibrating with tension. He felt himself flush hot with shame as he regarded the physical manifestation of this flaw; half biology and half technology gone wrong, a sick joke that had followed him through to death like a rotting albatross.
“Smeg.” Lister said, softly, as he looked between the code and Rimmer’s shaking form. “It’s that nervous condition you have, isn’t it? The thing with the T count?”
Rimmer’s jaw hung open for a moment. “Kryten told me.” Lister said in explanation, shuffling his feet. “After your medical…”
“After I ordered him not to?” Rimmer crossed his arms. “I expected as much.” His tone was defeated, and the rant Lister was expecting never came.
“He didn’t mean any harm.” Lister said, moving closer. “I think… he just wanted us to understand why you were acting the way you were, you know. Everyone’s got a breaking point.” Lister sighed. Kryten’s explanation had soothed the anger and betrayal he’d felt that day, but those memories were not wounds he wished to open, especially not while inside of Rimmer. “Listen, what’s the big deal here? I’ve seen the psy-moon. What’s so different about this?”
“There are things in there I don’t want you to see.” Rimmer said, stiffly, the memories of his most recent death all too clear in his mind; his clumsiness, his panic, his fear as he failed as Ace. “Can’t a man have some privacy, some dignity? Or is that too much for me to ask?”
“Right now it is, yeah.” Lister said, with a sigh. “I don’t like doing this to you, you know. I swore to myself that if there was a way to find you I would find you, no matter what it took. We’re almost free, but in order to get out we have to go through this. Shh, Arn…” Lister pulled Rimmer close as he stood rigidly in place, trying to show no emotion. The more he fought it, the more it looked to Lister like he was on the brink of tears. Rimmer didn’t resist, but he didn’t reciprocate, either. “Maybe it was selfish of me, you know, Maybe you were right about that, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I’m gonna have to see whatever it is that you’re hiding in there. I’m sorry that I dragged you back from the dead, twice. I’m sorry I’ve brought you face to face with something that could kill you a third time. I’m sorry that no one else ever loved you, you know.”
“And you do?” Rimmer croaked out, skeptically. He was in no mood for one of Lister’s wind ups.
“I’m gonna prove it.” Lister said, releasing him. “The way I see it, the only way back to reality is through that code. With your condition, there’s no way you can break through it without having an electronic aneurism, right? Except, I think that I can hold it back. If I stay here and manipulate the code from inside, you have a chance to get out.”
“But what about you?” Rimmer asked, his eyes widening. “You have no idea what’s going to happen! It could kill you, too, you know. Or maybe you’ll be stuck here forever. You can’t do something like this without knowing what’s going to happen!”
Lister shrugged. “I knew the risks when I came here.” He replied. “If you come to, pull my helmet off. That should bring me back. If I die in the process, then we’re even, hey?”
“You didn’t kill me.” Rimmer whispered, after a moment. “I wanted this.”
“I pushed you.” Lister sighed. He looked up at the obstacle before them, and then back at Rimmer. “Remember the plan.” He said. Rimmer nodded, and stifled a surprised noise as Lister lunged upwards and caught his lips in a fierce kiss. He was still recoiling in shock as Lister fell away, and broke into a sprint towards the wall of code. Speechless and still feeling the ghost of the warm, firm pressure on his mouth, Rimmer followed.
Pairing: Lister/Rimmer
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own Red Dwarf, and I do not profit from this. I just do this to amuse myself.
This comes after the following:
Function
Static
Love
Release
Reunited
Byway
Rimmer felt the familiar gnawing in the pit of his stomach, the quickening of his pulse as he broke into a cold sweat. Whatever was in that noxious wall of mist was far worse than the memories he’d repressed, it was the potential of the worst case scenario, the fear of the unknown, Murphy’s Law laid out before them in a great, stinking barricade.
Sir, when you died you were recreated as a hologram and your exact personality was refined to an algorithm and duplicated electronically. If that algorithm contained a flaw, that flaw would be duplicated also.
Rimmer sunk to his knees, shaking. He couldn’t run. If there was one hard lesson he’d learnt throughout his existence, it was that you couldn’t run away from yourself, no matter how desperately you tried.
Kryten, I don't want the others to know about this. I want you to behave as if everything's absolutely normal.
“Rimmer, you okay, man?” Lister knelt beside him, placing a hand on his shoulder.
Rimmer raised his eyes from the crook of his elbow and took a shuddering breath. His face was red and his breath was ragged. “Don’t. Just… don’t.” he stood up, his legs shaky. “We can’t go this way, that’s for sure. Better retrace our steps and formulate a plan.”
It's not common, but it's possible for a hologram to die.
Lister drew back his hand, reluctantly. “We got no choice.” He said, turning to unsuccessfully meet Rimmer’s eyes, which darted from his gaze. “It’s forwards or back at this point. I don’t like the looks of that thing any more than you do, but we’ve got to get through this. We’ll crack the coding and figure out what’s gone wrong.”
Rimmer clenched his fists. “You can’t just fix or debug me or whatever it is you have in mind, you know. It’s more complicated than that.”
Lister regarded him with those deep, soulful eyes, as though he understood. Goit. “I know, I know.” He began. “Since I… since you’ve been gone, see, I spent all my time learning whatever I could about holograms. I think I can figure it out if I give it time-“
“It’s part of me.” Rimmer said, tensely. “Since I was alive, and it’s part of my core programming. There’s nothing to figure out, so we can stop investigating this particular course of action right now. Isn’t there some other way around it?” His entire body was vibrating with tension. He felt himself flush hot with shame as he regarded the physical manifestation of this flaw; half biology and half technology gone wrong, a sick joke that had followed him through to death like a rotting albatross.
“Smeg.” Lister said, softly, as he looked between the code and Rimmer’s shaking form. “It’s that nervous condition you have, isn’t it? The thing with the T count?”
Rimmer’s jaw hung open for a moment. “Kryten told me.” Lister said in explanation, shuffling his feet. “After your medical…”
“After I ordered him not to?” Rimmer crossed his arms. “I expected as much.” His tone was defeated, and the rant Lister was expecting never came.
“He didn’t mean any harm.” Lister said, moving closer. “I think… he just wanted us to understand why you were acting the way you were, you know. Everyone’s got a breaking point.” Lister sighed. Kryten’s explanation had soothed the anger and betrayal he’d felt that day, but those memories were not wounds he wished to open, especially not while inside of Rimmer. “Listen, what’s the big deal here? I’ve seen the psy-moon. What’s so different about this?”
“There are things in there I don’t want you to see.” Rimmer said, stiffly, the memories of his most recent death all too clear in his mind; his clumsiness, his panic, his fear as he failed as Ace. “Can’t a man have some privacy, some dignity? Or is that too much for me to ask?”
“Right now it is, yeah.” Lister said, with a sigh. “I don’t like doing this to you, you know. I swore to myself that if there was a way to find you I would find you, no matter what it took. We’re almost free, but in order to get out we have to go through this. Shh, Arn…” Lister pulled Rimmer close as he stood rigidly in place, trying to show no emotion. The more he fought it, the more it looked to Lister like he was on the brink of tears. Rimmer didn’t resist, but he didn’t reciprocate, either. “Maybe it was selfish of me, you know, Maybe you were right about that, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I’m gonna have to see whatever it is that you’re hiding in there. I’m sorry that I dragged you back from the dead, twice. I’m sorry I’ve brought you face to face with something that could kill you a third time. I’m sorry that no one else ever loved you, you know.”
“And you do?” Rimmer croaked out, skeptically. He was in no mood for one of Lister’s wind ups.
“I’m gonna prove it.” Lister said, releasing him. “The way I see it, the only way back to reality is through that code. With your condition, there’s no way you can break through it without having an electronic aneurism, right? Except, I think that I can hold it back. If I stay here and manipulate the code from inside, you have a chance to get out.”
“But what about you?” Rimmer asked, his eyes widening. “You have no idea what’s going to happen! It could kill you, too, you know. Or maybe you’ll be stuck here forever. You can’t do something like this without knowing what’s going to happen!”
Lister shrugged. “I knew the risks when I came here.” He replied. “If you come to, pull my helmet off. That should bring me back. If I die in the process, then we’re even, hey?”
“You didn’t kill me.” Rimmer whispered, after a moment. “I wanted this.”
“I pushed you.” Lister sighed. He looked up at the obstacle before them, and then back at Rimmer. “Remember the plan.” He said. Rimmer nodded, and stifled a surprised noise as Lister lunged upwards and caught his lips in a fierce kiss. He was still recoiling in shock as Lister fell away, and broke into a sprint towards the wall of code. Speechless and still feeling the ghost of the warm, firm pressure on his mouth, Rimmer followed.
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no subject
Date: 2008-05-18 08:52 pm (UTC)Okay, squee past. I really like this chapter, and not just for the obvious. You have a very good interplay with these two, and you're bringing out a lot of the early-Rimmerness from before Arn grew up into the man we see in series 5 and 6. (and 7. Barrie can say he's a fat bastard all he likes, but Rimmer's still yum.) It's nice to see that Lister can reach inside him like that, touch him so easily.
And, now I wanna know what Lister sees in there!
no subject
Date: 2008-05-20 01:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-19 05:15 pm (UTC)I’m sorry that no one else ever loved you, you know.
That's my Dave.
I'm really enjoying this, you know. :)
no subject
Date: 2008-05-20 01:16 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-19 09:47 pm (UTC)As kahvi said, you write Lister so well!
no subject
Date: 2008-05-20 01:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-20 01:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-20 04:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-20 10:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-21 04:30 am (UTC)Your interpretations are spot on to mine! COMPLETELY! It's like your in my brain which really is scary, but I can't wait for more@ I can't wait to find out what Rimsy's hiding
no subject
Date: 2008-05-22 05:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-26 07:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-27 06:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-06-14 12:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-06-14 08:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-11 10:51 am (UTC)*running to computer every 5 minnutes*
no subject
Date: 2008-08-11 11:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-01-02 11:59 am (UTC)In pretty much that order...
And I think you're a wonderful, wonderful writer. I do like it when I can hear characters voices in my head - and no, I don't need to up the meds. just yet - and with this series, they're coming in loud and clear.
no subject
Date: 2009-01-04 05:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-13 06:05 am (UTC)