Fic: Scraps - R/L (imp) - PG-13

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

Title: Scraps
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Rimmer/Lister (implied)
Disclaimer: I do not now, nor have I ever, owned Red Dwarf. Nor do I make any money from this fannish venture.
Spoilers: Rimmerworld.
Notes: I was inspired by the wonderful characterizations of sunny_bexster's Till You Love Yourself and madlovescience's The Reality Is... and wanted to write some introspective Lister. Thanks to smaych for the setting idea, and the beta!



What was left of a person, Lister wondered, when you’d stopped caring about them? When you were beyond caring? He breathed in the damp, stuffy air of the dungeon the Rimmers had made, staring at the grubby walls until the guard poked him meaningfully with his spear, urging him to move on. No, he thought, but really. What's left? Rimmer had never been important enough to hate, in the grand scheme of things. Oh, Lister had come close many times, after the accident, when it had just been the two of them, however much the Cat and Holly made it seem otherwise. But not really. It was just that when you spent all your time with a person, that person tended to occupy your thoughts more than others, was all. And with Rimmer, those thoughts were never positive.

"In here," the guard grumbled nasally, shoving them into a small cell.

No, he had never hated Rimmer. Gradually, he had learned to dislike him in a sort of pleasant, familiar way. He really was the closest thing Rimmer had to a friend, which was saying something. Maybe, it was because Lister knew exactly what to expect from him, which was nothing. When you expected nothing, you were never ever disappointed.

Except, of course, Lister had been.


The hull shook and shuddered around them, creaking complaints in a dying voice. Lister paid no attention. His entire focus was on the man behind the Simulant's shoulder, and that man's eyes as they darted from the escape-pod to Lister and the others, and back again. Lister could have sworn those eyes were some sort of brownish-green, but clearly there was quite a bit of yellow in them.

"You can't be serious," he said. It wasn't even a question, because really, the whole idea was beyond ludicrous.

The Simulant replied, thinking he was talking to her, but Lister ignored her, keeping Rimmer in his gaze, daring him, daring him to look back. Rimmer didn't. Every time his eyes fell on the pod, they lingered a little while longer. Well, fine. OK. That was Rimmer. His instinct was to escape; it always was. But leaving now would kill the rest of them. Rimmer knew that, and Lister knew he knew that, so there was absolutely no way... Rimmer took a step towards the pod, and something jagged and cold shot through Lister. No. He wouldn't. It wasn't possible.

"I don't believe you're being serious." Lister enunciated every word, carefully. Clearly, Rimmer was in some sort of fear-induced trance. Lister just had to snap him out of it.

"I do not understand why you're having such problems grasping this concept," the Simulant replied, irritatedly, droning on while Lister tried to keep Rimmer in locked in place with the intensity of his attention. He couldn't have thought this through.

"I'm going to say this one more time," Lister said, quietly. "You've still got a chance to change your mind." Maybe he was smeghead enough to let other people die so he could live, but people he knew? People he'd lived with for years and years, people he'd argued with, people who'd rescued him more times than Lister could count! "Think about it, everything we've been through, does none of that mean anything to you?"

Don't I mean anything to you, he wanted to add. I know you hate the other two, the feeling is mutual, but us... we're... we're... Rimmer hesitated, finally meeting Lister's eyes. Lister couldn't breathe. For a split second, they were the only two people in the room.

Then Rimmer closed his eyes, and went for the pod.


The door slammed behind them, the sound of keys turning in a lock following soon thereafter. Lister's eyes were getting used to the dark, and it didn't take him long to notice the shape huddling in the corner, though at first he thought it was just a heap of discarded bedding. Then he saw the dark blue legs sticking out from underneath it, and took a step forward. What is left, he thought, when you've gone beyond not caring? There was an murmur in his chest, like a an appliance he'd forgotten to turn off, left in a kitchen somewhere long ago.

He lifted the blanket.

Comments

[hazeltea.livejournal.com]

That scene always made me ache for both of them. There is so much misunderstanding, layers and layers. This was a nice suprise to come home to!

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

Well, I only see the one side of it, but for me, you know, this picture says so much:

http://www.saers.com/~kat/Rimmerworld/RW25.jpg

Some excellent acting there, by all concerned.

Thank you - I'm glad you liked it!

[tits-teapot.livejournal.com]

Yay! I've always loved these scenes and I used to imagine, what Was Rimmer thinking about. Especially what was he thinking about, when Lister lifted the blanket.
I know you hate the other two, the feeling is mutual, but us... we're... we're...
Oh this! <3 Great!

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's a powerful moment, isn't it? Which is a strange thing to say about a Science Fiction comedy, but Red Dwarf is like that. ;)

Thank you very much - I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[ldhenson.livejournal.com]

This is great. I think these kinds of vignettes are generally tricky to do without interrupting the pacing or flow of the original scene, but here it fits in just right. I really like the intensity of the flashback.

[kahvi.livejournal.com]

Yes, I worried about exactly that, so I'm glad you feel it worked! I always thought that was an incredibly intense scene, and I wanted to capture that tension and emotion. Thank you very much - I'm glad you enjoyed it!