reddwarfslash | An Unexpected Change (part 2)

Part 4 – Sex, lies and videotape

For several minutes Lister didn’t move, just stared. Finally he snapped out of his stupor and desperately leant forward and flicked the screen off. That had to be it, Lister thought dully. That had to be the reason for all the odd behaviour. He had expected to feel sick to the stomach after watching it but instead, and to his alarm, he was experiencing a somewhat different sensation in a slightly lower region. Smeg, he thought again, disgusted more at himself that at Rimmer. How could he feel turned on by this it was sick – wasn’t it? He got up to leave but changed his mind and moved back to the console.

He grabbed a tape from the shelf and jammed it into the machine, hitting the record button. He wasn’t entirely sure why and had a feeling that he didn’t want to know. In the end he told himself that it was so he could analyse things and decided how best to proceed. After all, in told himself, that might not be it at all – there might be something else later on. That might have been an odd fluke on a day Rimmer was feeling a bit disorientated. The recording ended and Lister grabbed the tape and yanked out the leads connecting the machines.

Where to go? He wondered where Rimmer was – a little guiltily. Stashing the tape in his pocket he headed for the sleeping quarters as he checked his watch. Luckily his shift was over and Kryten would be on now so he didn’t have to worry about going back to the Cat. The door to the room he and Rimmer shared was open and Lister peered in cautiously. It was empty.

Rimmer had been down in the hold for a while now. It was the only place he could think to go where the others where unlikely to show up. Insulting Kryten had improved his mood slightly for a short while but even he couldn’t keep that up all day. If only. These two small words had been with Rimmer all his life and he knew them well. If only he’d had the right snooty parents, if only he’d been sent to the Academy like his brothers, if only they hadn’t served Gespatcho soup that night at the Captain’s table, if only he hadn’t shared a room with Lister. Lister. His mind always turned itself back to him. He heard a heart-breaking moan and it was a moment before he realised that the sound had come from him. When had it all started? Certainly it was during his time on Rimmerworld that he’d really come to understand his feelings for the other man but surely it must have started before that?

He thought a few moments but then gave up trying to pinpoint it. It had happened and that was that. All he knew was that he was in deep smeg! On the surface he was still horrified at the thought that he was attracted to another man. He’d always been strictly butter side up. That nancy stuff was more suited to Ace – his doppelganger. No not to another man – what horrified him was that it was Lister. Lister for smeg’s sake – the person he hated most in the whole world! Deep down though he had to admit that it felt somehow natural, it felt right. He tried to imagine what Lister’s reaction would be but decided to save himself the agony of it. The only thing to do, he decided firmly, was to hope it was simply a result of his long solitary confinement. With any luck he might get over it without Lister ever needing to know. The most pressing issue, he thought suddenly was to convince Lister that he was all right so that those awkward questions would stop. He had to act as if nothing was different. He’d start now, this minute! And so Arnold J. Rimmer set off in search of Dave Lister.

Lister had shut the door and he now sat in a chair with his back to it as he watched the video he’d just made. There was nothing else new after that last moment he’d seen. It was just the same thing playing over and over again with slight variations now and again. As he sat there Lister tried hard to imagine what it would be like kiss Rimmer. To feel the other man’s tongue exploring his mouth, to feel those hands on his bare skin…He tried to tell himself that he’d be repelled but the ever more prominent bulge in his trousers was suggesting otherwise.

The scene began yet again and Lister watched from Rimmer’s point of view as the imaginary Lister approached then leant in for the kiss. Without even registering what he was doing Lister moved his hand down, unbuttoned his trousers and began to stroke himself gently. Without warning his mind shot back to the psi-moon. He remembered looking down and seeing Rimmer chained to the wall. His mind now registered things he’d not noticed before – the hologram’s toned body, the sight of the oil glistening on his skin…He’d had a physical presence there even without his hard light drive. Lister could have touched him. He could have run his hand over that gleaming bare chest. This hand was currently pumping furiously and he knew that he would come at any moment. He would have been at my mercy, chained like that, Lister thought suddenly. That image sent him over the edge and he climaxed as yet another imaginary Lister leant in to kiss Rimmer again.

Lister grabbed one of his dirty shirts from the floor and quickly wiped his hand off before doing his trousers up again. He wasn’t quite sure what he was feeling – guilt, disgust, lust, confusion, contentment or just blind smegging panic! He did feel somehow at peace though – as if things made sense at last. He went to eject the tape but changed his mind. No, he thought, he’d watch the scene one last time and it would give him chance to gather his thoughts.

The cell door opened and Lister stood there. A bright light glowed behind him and in the distance there were blue skies and rolling green hills.

“It’s OK, Arnie,” imaginary Lister said, “I’ve come to save you. You’ll be safe with me now.”

Imaginary Lister held out his hand to help Rimmer up. There was the embrace.
And then…

The kiss was interrupted by a sort of choking sound behind him and Lister spun round in his chair.

In the doorway stood Rimmer.

Part 5 – Revelations

Rimmer wore a somewhat dazed expression as he stood there, staring at the screen. At that moment it looked like the imaginary Lister was trying to ram his tongue down Rimmer’s throat.

Lister was also staring but at Rimmer rather than the screen. The hologram didn’t seem to have properly registered his presence yet and so it seemed that the best course was to keep quiet and still. He wanted as much time as possible before he had to face whatever scene was coming.

As the onscreen kiss ended Rimmer seemed to come out of his trance and began to look round wildly. His eyes lit upon Lister. He was confused. Part of him wanted to be angry at this blatant raping of his mind that Lister had managed, another part wanted to try and deny the whole thing and a third part wanted to break into hysterical sobs. The look on the hologram’s face suggested that all options were evenly matched at present. The eyes spoke of blind panic, the flared nostrils suggested anger and the quivering lower lip was preparing for imminent breakdown.

Lister stood slowly and faced Rimmer. He felt awkward and guilty and kept nervously switching his weight from one foot to the other. He knew he should say something but he had no idea what so he decided to mentally yell at himself instead. Smeg, smeg, smeg, smeg, smeg! The tension in the room was so intense that Lister realised he’d have to do something or they’d both be standing like this all day. He registered that the tape was still playing and he turned from Rimmer for a moment and hit the stop button. That did it.

“What the smeg do you think you’re doing?!?” Rimmer practically screamed as he marched forward a few paces into the room. For now a mix of anger and hysteria seemed to have won the inner battle.

Lister involuntarily took a step back. He could tell that Rimmer’s emotional response was intense by the fact that he hadn’t added “gimboid” or “baboon-bellied space beatnik” at the end of the sentence. That and the fact that the hologram’s eyes were so wide they could have been mistaken for flying saucers and his face and clenched fists had drained of all colour. Lister found himself slightly worried. Not for himself but for Rimmer. If he kept this up he’d short-circuit his light bee!

“Look man, I’m sorry,” Lister said, his arms out in front of him as if to ward off attack. “I made the tape from your hard drive files. I wanted to find out what was up – and I knew you’d never tell me – and smeg it all Rimmer – I just wanted to help!”

During this speech the war in Rimmer’s mind had continued to rage and suddenly denying everything seemed the way to go. He took several deep breaths and tried to force a smile as he let out a nervous laugh. It sounded hollow and cold as the sound echoed round the room.

“Haha, gotcha Listy, you gimboid,” he said, trying to keep his voice level. “A little joke I planned – and you fell for it – ha!”

“A joke?” Lister queried sceptically. He didn’t believe a word of it. Rimmer always had been uselessly at telling lies.

“Yes indeed, matey,” Rimmer continued in a desperately jovial tone. “The look on your face – I haven’t been so amused in years. Not since that time your harness broke and you fell into the cargo bay!”

Lister considered the situation carefully. It would be so easy to play along. He could pretend he believed it was a joke, hurl a few insults at Rimmer and let the hologram think he’d won. Part of him wanted to do it – not least to end this conversation. Another part of him spoke up though and tried to reason with him. He looked at Rimmer and the pitiful state he was in. To hell with it, he thought. He wants you and you want him and if you don’t do something now there may never be another chance, He wanted Rimmer? When had that happened? He didn’t know and he guessed it didn’t matter in the end. He made his choice and took a step forward.

“Lock!” Lister called out, looking past Rimmer and towards the door.

Rimmer spun round to see the door slide shut then turned back to Lister in a panic, seeing the other man take another step towards him. What was happening? What was Lister doing? He really had no idea of what was going on except that his “deny it all” strategy seemed to have taken a knock.

“I know it’s not a joke,” Lister said calmly. “I know that you’re attracted to me.” Any other time Lister would have ended this with a cheeky smile but the current situation was too serious for that.

“Don’t be a goit, Lister,” Rimmer replied in despair. “How could anyone love you – you stinking, festering gimboid of a slob?”

Ah, thought Lister, hearing Rimmer make a grave mistake. He was unable to repress a smile now. Here was the Rimmer he knew so well and insulting banter he could work with if he could only decide on the best way.

He paused before replying. “It’s not use Rimmer,” he said calmly. “You give yourself away. I only spoke about attraction but you just brought in love. So I may be a complete smegbrain but you love me all the same!” Wrong choice!!

Panic and hysteria won out at last in Rimmer’s great mental struggle. He might as well be dead, he thought. Well, hologramatically dead, he amended. Better dead than smeg. Now that Lister knew he’d never hear the end of it. His life would be a living hell. He couldn’t stay here. He quickly decided to do what he always did in such situations - run and find something to cower behind. With that he went to make a dash for the door.

“Arnold wait!” Lister called out, seeing his companion’s intention.

Arnold. Lister didn’t call him Arnold. Rimmer – yes. Smeghead – definitely. Not Arnold. In thinking this he took his mind off the running and before he reached the door he tripped and found himself falling forwards.

Rimmer came down heavily on the metal floor, his hard light drive preventing him from falling through. Hologram or not that had still winded him a little. He turned and started to sit up then stopped in surprise. Lister was standing there ready to help him. He’d seen this so many times in his dreams that he almost reached out and took the proffered hand but he stopped himself just in time. This was clearly a joke on Lister’s part to play with his mind. At that point the other man grew tired of waiting.

It hadn’t even occurred to Lister that he was acting out the dream. He’d seen Rimmer fall then gone over to help him up, offering his hand quite innocently. That was all. When Rimmer just continued to sit there staring at him Lister changed his plan. Leaning forward a little he grasped Rimmer’s right arm and pulled him upwards.

Rimmer stumbled forward a few paces as he stood and ended up so close to Lister that their bodies were nearly touching. Lister’s left hand still rested on his arm and he gulped and went to step back but an arm moved round his back and cut off his escape.

It was now or never. Seeing Rimmer’s continuing indecision Lister realised that he would have to make the first move. He wrapped an arm around Rimmer, hugging him closer till their chests pressed together and then he slowly leant in and planted a kiss on Rimmer’s mouth.

Part 6 – The Beginning

He was surprised at how soft and pliant the hologram’s lips were. He hadn’t expected that. He moved back slightly to gauge what response he was getting. To his surprise Rimmer looked as if he were about to cry.

“Lister,” Rimmer begged. “I know I probably deserve it for all the times I’ve insulted you and been a complete bastard - but please don’t mock me!”

“Who said I was mocking you, you stupid smeghead,” said Lister playfully as he offered a cheeky smile. Now that the first kiss was over he felt more confident and he had no intention of letting Rimmer escape.

Rimmer couldn’t quite keep up with what was happening. Suddenly Lister was kissing him again. He’d imagined it for so long and now it was real. He was still a little suspicious but then Lister moved position slightly and he felt the evidence of the other man’s arousal pressing into his leg. This turned him on to such an extent that he couldn’t suppress a moan and wrapped his arms round Lister too, trying to bring their bodies even closer together.

Lister took advantage of this moan to push his tongue deep into Rimmer’s mouth, exploring intently till their tongues touched and a shudder past through him. Then, despite Rimmer’s unintelligible protests, he pulled away. He had decided it was time that they moved somewhere a little more comfortable and he pulled the hologram with him towards the bed. He pushed Rimmer down onto the lower bunk and climbed on top of him.

Rimmer watched on in an amazed silence as Lister carefully began to unbutton his padded blue shirt, sitting up a little so that he could shed the item completely. He shivered, but not from cold, as Lister’s hands explored his chest, fingers rubbing gently against his nipples. It was only when his partner began to work the zipper on his trousers that he found his voice again.

“Uh – Listy,” he asked cautiously, “Do you know what you are doing?”

Lister grinned at him. “We’ll soon find out I guess.” He knew that wasn’t exactly what Rimmer had meant but he just widened his grin then added thoughtfully. “I’ve not been with a hologram before though.”

Rimmer’s laugh was natural and light and it gave Lister a pleasurable thrill. He saw Rimmer in a way he never had before. A fun, relaxed Rimmer. He almost didn’t recognise him.

“I thought you were going to say you’d never been with another man before,” Rimmer said with another laugh.

“That too!” agreed Lister with a smile.

Rimmer automatically lifted his hips as Lister pulled off the rest of his clothing then looked up as he felt the other man’s hands leave his legs where they’d been resting. He watched as Lister slowly stripped off his own shirt. He was a little nervous now. He’d had very little sexual experience and most of that had been with an inflatable doll! Rimmer couldn’t think for much longer though as just then his eyes closed and his head slammed back into the pillow and Lister’s fingers moved gingerly over his aching arousal.

Lister was a little unsure too but gradually started to judge things both from knowing what he’d always like women to do to him and from the noises Rimmer was making. He found himself wondering how he would have felt if someone had told him a few years – or even a few days – ago that this would be happening. He decided not to worry about this and simply enjoyed Rimmer’s moan as he took him completely into his mouth.
This was too much for Rimmer and within moments he let out a cry of ecstasy and collapsed, completely spent. When he next opened his eyes he realised that Lister had finished undressing and was now lying next to him, naked.

“It this – well – weird?” asked Rimmer nervously.

Lister thought for a moment. “I thought it would be but actually it’s kinda not!” he decided with a slight shrug. He cast a sly glance at Rimmer and grinned widely. “You’ll have to do better than that next time though, Rimsy,” he remarked. “You came far too soon – I hadn’t even begun all the things I’d planned to do.”

The thought that there would be a “next time” was enough to spark a vague reaction in the groin area and, on thinking of all the other things Lister might do, Rimmer was fully aroused once more and he lunged at Lister, pinning him beneath him and furiously kissing his face, neck and chest as Lister squirmed in mock protest.

There was a playful scuffle and Lister ended up face down on the bed with Rimmer on top of him. They both paused. They knew what the natural progression would be but were afraid of taking it. Finally Rimmer made a move and, reaching underneath Lister, began to stroke his new lover. His touch was gently at first but soon his grip tightened and he pumped almost viciously. He was pleased at the variety of groans that were coming from beneath him and without thinking he pressed against the other man with his own erection.

The delicious pressure there helped finish Lister off. That and the realisation that Rimmer had become quite dominant now that he’d found his feet a bit. “Do it!” he replied to the hologram’s questioning call on his name.

Rimmer pulled his hand free and looked in wonder at the sticky whiteness on his fingers. A nudge from Lister brought him back to reality though and he carefully rubbed himself, using the semen as a lubricant, before moving into position. He wondered what it was going to be like moving inside Lister and that thought spurred him on. He pushed forward slowly but firmly, mindful of Lister’s reactions.

It hurt so much at first that Lister had to bite down to avoid crying out but there was no way he was going to ask Rimmer to stop. The pain quickly subsided anyway and was replaced by a strange uncomfortable feeling. Rimmer’s final thrust in produced a new sensation though – a very pleasurable one – and Lister pushed back against him to try and prolong it.

“Are you ok?” whispered Rimmer in response to Lister’s groan.

“Yeah but for smeg’s sake don’t stop moving,” replied Lister huskily.

Rimmer didn’t need to be told twice and he began to build up a steady rhythm as Lister moved to meet each thrust. Finally he could hold back now longer and with a silent cry of “Geronimo” he came, moaning with pleasure.

The two of them collapsed in a pile of sweaty, entangled limbs. Both were breathing heavily and took a moment to catch their breaths.

“Listy,” Rimmer began slowly, “I…”

“Let’s just rest now,” suggested Lister with a sigh. “We can talk in the morning – you complete and utter smeghead.”

Rimmer laughed and relaxed back into the mattress. “Ok you stupid, ugly goit,” he replied.

Lister pulled the blanket up over them and they settled down in each other’s embrace. He found himself wondering what the Cat and Kryten would make of this somewhat unexpected change but in the end decided to follow his own advice and let it wait till the morning. He glanced at Rimmer. It looked like the hologram had already drifted off to sleep. Absentmindedly Lister reached up and ran his fingers through Rimmer’s soft curls before running them gently across the “H” on his forehead. With a sigh he leant back and drifted off. His last though was “Oh well – it’s been one of those days!”

Rimmer was indeed already asleep and dreaming happily. This time in his dream Lister lay sleeping in his arms.

Things were going to be very different from now on!

The End (or The Beginning)