Red Dwarf Slash

The sun is shining in Seattle! Anything is possible! So here's a weekend challenge.
Just a lark. Penalty for not participating - er, nothing. Reward for participating - my undying affection.

It's a Leonard Cohen kinda challenge. Use one of the following for inspiration (it doesn't have to appear in the fic, it doesn't have to be angsty, just springboard):
Hallelujah. I'm talkin' John Cale's cover.
Democracy - the quote:
I'm as stubborn as those garbage bags that time will not decay
I'm junk, but I'm still holding up this little wild bouquet...