[identity profile] smaych.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] reddwarfslash
Title: Tea
Pairing: Lister/Rimmer - if you look at it like it's a magic eye picture
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I don't own Red Dwarf or make any money.
Spoilers: Legion
Notes: Many thanks to [livejournal.com profile] kahvi for all the help and advice - priceless as always.



Rimmer found even the act of making a cup of tea the most relaxing part of his day. Holding the hot mug in his hands and blowing on the surface, the steam rushing away from his breath as it never did when he was soft light, he always felt several steps closer to sanity.

In moments like those everything was quiet and calm. In moments like those Rimmer could almost believe, just for a minute, just until Lister appeared, reeking of lager and with breath that could melt ice caps, that there was still an iota of civilisation left in the universe, and that he was part of it.

"You know, Lister, tea takes time to make. It's not instant gratification. It also takes some degree of skill and precision. The water should only have been boiled once. Then the tea should be steeped but not stewed. There should always be milk – but there should never be too much milk."

Lister stopped in the doorway to Starbug's tiny kitchen area. "Eh?"

“Tea, Lister. It's one of a class of beverages I like to think of as not beer. I don't expect you to have heard of it.”

Rimmer regarded the lager in Lister's hands. He wrinkled his nose, pursing his lips in disgust. Lister was looking at him as if he'd gone mad. Rimmer held up the hot, freshly-brewed cup, as if to illustrate his point.

“This, Listy, is an appropriate morning drink.”

Lister straightened in the doorway and ambled towards him, lips curved up on one side in that bizarre half-smile he had. Rimmer took a few steps backwards, by instinct, hitting the edge of the kitchen unit. Lister stopped in front of him, their toes just about touching, and slowly dipped two fingers into the warm tea cup before noisily licking the tea off them. He shrugged.

“Tastes like cardboard to me, mate.”

Before Rimmer could respond, he had disappeared back into the midsection to resume his noxious breakfast. Rimmer stared at his ruined tea and sighed. How could he ever have expected Lister to understand?

Date: 2007-09-23 10:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] randysugardandy.livejournal.com
shouldnt be erotic. shouldnt be erotic.

TEA WILL NEVER BE THE SAME!

i love the way u did rimmer. just so bloody rimmer,lister too; goshdarnit its just great characterisation...

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