Proximity (Part 5/7)

[tsukinobun.livejournal.com]

In case you need a refresher:
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4

Proximity (Part 5/7)
Pairing: Lister/Rimmer
Rating: Probably NC-17
Notes: Thank you dauphkantus  for being an eager and thorough beta! <3<3<3 You are wonderful.
My first foray into a fellatio scene (and Rimmer's, incidentally...heh). I now feel more fully inducted into slash writing. ;) Well...almost. We'll see how I handle something even *naughtier*, eh? Egads...well, let me worry about that another time (like when writing part 6). For now, enjoy the smut. <3

Avoiding someone on a ship as small as Starbug was not an easy task, yet for nearly a week, Rimmer had barely seen Lister at all. It seemed he’d opted out of all his cockpit duties, leaning on the excuse of periodic dizziness and confusion due to his head injury. What a load of tosh! Arnold knew better, of course. Anyone able to wank was well enough to report for duty. And he’d seen just how able Lister was in that area.

There were two things worrying the hologram, and neither of them was Lister’s mental state, despite the disturbing events of a few nights ago. He was curious about whether Lister had regained any memories, but hardly enough to ask and find out. Indeed, one of the things concerning him was the fact that in his mind he had already devised several things to do to Lister, if only he could finagle a smegging moment alone with the evasive man. It was worrying because it meant he was being pulled into the game rather than playing god from the sidelines.

The other, perhaps less easily-defined, thing he was troubled by was the complete lack of sexual self-knowledge he had. It was difficult to know how to feel about this…thing with Lister, but even if he could arrive at a definitive feeling, attraction for example, it was even more difficult to place that feeling in context. What about his conservative Ionian belief structure and self-image? Arnold J. Rimmer was no pansy. Admittedly, he had not had a huge number of sexual liaisons, but enough to know he could make it with a girl. And surely, that singular experience would have been fun if he had been less nervous and confused at the time. Surely.

The thing was, thinking about Lister kissing him did more than swell his ego (though it did that considerably). Quite frankly it turned him on. At least, he imagined that this was what it was like to be turned on. As an alive, flesh-and-blood man he had thought girls were pretty, and had erections – though there was little supporting evidence to suggest the two were linked. Human males had bodily reactions, and noticing attractive people did not mean you wanted to boff them. It struck Rimmer as sadly poignant that only now he’d been dead for three million years did he feel lust for the first time. As a hologram, intermittent erections did not occur in soft-light form(thankfully the designers of the light bee had not felt it necessary to recreate that particular quirk), and until earlier this week he had not had a hard-on since …he couldn’t even remember.

It was fan-smegging-tastic. But terrifying.

As inadequate as Arnold had always felt about sex, he felt even moreso now that his passions had been coaxed awake. There was no one to talk to about it, and how would he broach the subject if there were? No, his upbringing had taught him to never show a weakness or admit to being unusual. He’d always assumed he wasn’t swayed by such a low desire as sex, but had felt a confused longing to understand what other people experienced. His aim in life for several years had been to lose his virginity, but only because he knew what a stigma was attached to those who didn’t. There had been satisfaction in finally achieving his goal, but no pleasure.

Not until now had he known he, too, had a sexual appetite. But it wasn’t a normal one, was it? He liked…the idea of someone helpless, in his control. Really liked it. He’d never heard of other people who had this problem. It was sick, wasn’t it? It was all very confusing, and though he was familiar with loneliness, he had rarely felt more alone than in this realization.

It still filled him with a kind of disgust to consider homosexuality, but that aspect of his dilemma was secondary to his apparent kink for sadism (after all, hadn’t he always known, deep down, that he didn’t like girls?). These last few days had been a struggle to fight off an almost-constant stream of images of things to subject Lister to, many of them culminating in the dreadlocked man kneeling before him with begging eyes, and soft lips around his…

Smeg. Time for another cold shower. A result of these thoughts had been an accompanying near-constant bulge in his trousers. Something he wasn’t used to, and something that would not go away except with time or cold water. Arnold had never been much of a wanker, despite what people said behind his back, and even his recent forays into that sinful exercise had proven fruitless. It just didn’t…work. He was becoming more and more frustrated, with no release in sight.

Subconsciously he knew, and consciously he repressed, the thing that would allow him release. But it was unbearable to consider. It would ruin the illusion that he was in control of the game! It would mean he was an active participant in perversion. It would mean Lister would know his secret, and could use it against him. But oh, it would mean he could finally orgasm. Each hour brought him closer to conceding, though, that what he really needed (and soon, because the throbbing of his cock was driving him mad) was Lister on his knees, sucking him off.
~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lister sat up straighter as Rimmer opened the door to his bunkroom and stepped inside. He tried to appear as though he was still avidly re-reading his comic book, but the adrenaline was pumping and his body fought down the urge to flee. He had been avoiding the hologram carefully, and now he was trapped in a room with him. The sadistic bastard was blocking the exit. Play it cool, Listy. Don’t let him know you’re scared. That’s exactly what he wants. Don’t give it to him.

The door shut behind Rimmer.

Lister began to panic.

“Er, Listy…” Rimmer began weakly.

What did he want? What did the smegging psychopath want? Whatever it was, Lister would give it to him and send him on his way. No sense in making idle conversation, or starting an argument – just get him out of here as soon as possible.

Taking a closer look at the intruder, he noticed that Rimmer’s hair was growing slightly long. The natural curls were beginning to get out of hand. How unlike the hologram to forget his weekly trim, though undoubtedly it suited him. And furthermore, he held his hands clutched together in front of his body and bobbed on the balls of his feet, an unfamiliar stance that exhibited nervousness. Lister’s eyes tightened as he admitted to himself that the overall picture was one of a man who was not composed. In anyone but Rimmer, it might have seemed within the normal range, but for Smeghead this was tantamount to a breakdown.

Smeg, he was losing it, Lister thought. He’s gonna snap. I am trapped in a room with an unstable tosser who wants to kill me.

“…Lister. I’ve come to ask…well, you see, I …” he was fumbling over his words.

“What do you want, Rimmer?” Lister tried to ask casually, but the undertone of fear was audible.

Audible enough, in fact, for Arnold to hear it. His body relaxed, his eyes met Lister’s, and a comfortable smile appeared on his suddenly-determined face. So the goit was scared, was he? Smart lad.

The power in the room had shifted. Lister had signed away his escape with the unwilling admission of his unease.

“I want you to come here,” spoke a newly confident, commanding voice.

“Eh?” Lister replied, again failing to cover up his rising terror. “What for?” he asked, hesitantly.

Every uncertainty reflected in Lister’s face fed the lust in Rimmer. Oh gods, the thrill it sent through his heart; the sudden intense tingling in his groin. Sweet mercy, this felt so good.  

“Come here and find out,” he replied patiently, firmly.

Lister didn’t consider disobeying. It felt right to comply. He stood up, threw the comic onto the covers and walked toward the hologram.

Rimmer gave him a pleased smile.

Though he knew he should be afraid, there was something about the way his companion held himself, confidently, that made it difficult to reason. The hard-light projection was uncharacteristically centered and at-ease. It made Dave feel safe. It made him feel like his fear had been unfounded, and he could let the other man lead him into temptation if he so desired, so long as he went into it willingly.

And why not? He was sure there was some reason, but this very instant the most important thing in the world was feeling safe in Rimmer’s control. No more dread. If this was going to happen, it would happen with his consent. He silently relinquished his fears and awaited his fate, eyeing the lips in front of him with interest.

Rimmer noticed.

“You may kiss me.”

And Lister did, without restraint. He bit and licked, teased and tongued his way into Rimmer’s mouth, while the hologram responded with equal gusto.

Just enough, Arnold thought after a few minutes, and he pulled back.

Lister looked questioningly up at him.

“On your knees, squire.”

The scouser’s eyebrows shot up, but he did not falter. Immediately he fell to his knees and looked into his companion’s eyes from now much further below, awaiting a new request.

In front of him, the swelling in Rimmer’s trousers burned, he could feel the light-heat from it on his cheeks.

The hologram looked down at the eager face below and trembled with anticipation as his fantasy was about to be made flesh. God he was hard. He needed fewer clothes on. He considered just taking off his trousers but then admitted to himself that if this were to be perfect, he would have a fully sensual experience with no clothes at all.

Of course, Lister would have to join him in that.

“Take your clothes off. All of them.”

The eyebrows shot up again, but no hesitation was observed. Lister quickly shook his jacket off and threw it across the room. He pulled his shirt over his head to unveil sparse hair and smooth, dark nipples. His belly button was small and curved like a six.

He had to sit on the floor to shed his dark jeans, but they came off without him undoing the button or zipper. He wore no underwear underneath, nor any socks. His penis bobbed, fully erect, as he quickly got back into a kneeling position.

Rimmer was very pleased with the view. He admired it for a minute more before closing his eyes to concentrate his clothes away. A shimmering, then they were gone. Rimmer stood totally naked in front of Lister, and he had never felt more confident. How unprecedented.

Lister’s eyebrows went up for a third time as his eyes were suddenly treated to a stark-naked Rimmer. From his angle, and probably from any other, it was impressive. Naturally his attention was drawn to the tall cock, thick and mesmerizing in front of him. He wanted to take it into his mouth, but dared not without permission.

Rimmer noted the eagerness in Lister’s eyes and prepared his mind to accept that he was going to get his first ever blow job from the adoring scouser kneeling before him. Marvelous.

“Take it in your mouth.”

Lister leaned forward immediately and enveloped the head in his lips. His tongue moved gently back and forth on the underside, teasingly.

Rimmer had never felt anything like this and stifled a moan. So warm and impossibly wet, with a delicate precision that was disarming.

Lister gauged that his ministrations were receiving positive feedback and he slid further down on the cock, licking the newly claimed territory with slow, deliberate pressure.

Rimmer did gasp at this new sensation, and looked down at the scene unfolding. The image made him shiver, and a little dribble of pre-come released into Lister’s mouth. The kneeling man made a pleased sound at the tasteless substance hitting his tongue that vibrated the cock he was now lavishing with deep kisses. Lister closed his eyes, enjoying the sensation.

“Look at me.” Rimmer reprimanded, and Lister’s eyes opened instantly and veered upwards, meeting with the hologram’s. They held the look while Lister slid as much of the cock into his mouth as he comfortably could, the head at the back of his throat.

“…Listy,” Rimmer breathed out in ecstasy, the moment made more intimate by their locked gazes.

Lister decided to make him say that name again. He brought his hands up to rest on the other man’s buttocks, but waited with a question in his eyes for approval before letting skin touch hard-light skin. Rimmer gave a small nod, to allow the action.

Lister grabbed at Rimmer’s buttocks forcefully and deep-throated before he could convince himself not to. It wasn’t as difficult as he’d imagined, and he found the angle that worked best, noting how to avoid it hitting his gag reflex. He moved back and forth, now, quickly, letting the head go as far into him as it was able.

“Lister!...Oh!....Ohhhhhh…”

Rimmer nearly stumbled, and grabbed Lister’s short hair in his hands. It was the most amazing feeling. He could not have imagined this. Far from his earlier frustration with not being able to orgasm, he felt it building quickly.

  He began to thrust into Lister, using his hold on the other man’s hair to pull the two of them together. Lister’s eyes watered, but he adjusted his angle to make it work.

Any moment. He didn’t remember what it felt like to orgasm, but he knew it was about to happen.

“…I…I’m going to come, Lister…and I want you to…suck it down…”

Lister caressed the buttocks beneath his hands in assent.

Within seconds he felt the overwhelming rush of pleasure, and stars appeared in his vision. Then the spasms began and he emptied himself into Lister’s welcoming mouth.

“Yes, Lister! …ooohhhh, god…ohhhhhhh….”

Lister gently continued to suck after the hologram was spent (he had felt something hit the back of his throat but, being only light, it had dissipated before he could swallow it), causing more noises of contentment.

Then he slowly slid his mouth off of the shrinking erection.

Rimmer was quietly panting hologrammatic breaths. His grip loosened on Lister’s hair. Lister used the grip on Rimmer’s ass to balance as he moved to stand. His own erection stood proud and demanding between them.

Rimmer looked dazed, and Lister moved to kiss him. It was a soft, sloppy kiss, as his arms encircled the other man in an intimate embrace. When he leaned forward enough for his erection to brush against Rimmer’s stomach, the hologram recoiled.

Would that he could think clearly! He was still reeling from that experience, still numb to the world in a post-orgasmic mist.

But…Lister was kissing him. A kind of kissing he’d never experienced before. It wasn’t a proposition, more of a culmination. What the smeg was going on? And that…that couldn’t be…it was. Lister’s erect penis was leaning casually against his stomach. Oh dear god.

This was strange and close and…separate from the control game he’d just been playing. Had he suddenly lost ground? Had his control seeped into Lister as his ejaculate had been sucked down the goit’s throat? And those dark eyes, now questioning him, asking for something more.

Smeg.

 “You’re not so scary, are you?” Lister pondered aloud, before moving in for another kiss.

Rimmer was suddenly furious. He pulled himself apart from the other man, closed his eyes and concentrated. A clean uniform appeared on his body within seconds.

“You!” He began, angrily, pointing a shaking finger at Lister. “You…will regret that!”

He then turned and exited the room in a huff.

Now that Rimmer was gone, the fear returned in full to Lister’s sensibilities. He wasn’t a hundred percent sure what he’d done wrong, but he certainly believed he’d live to regret it.

 

Comments

<3

[dauphkantus.livejournal.com]

I see you made a few other changes too, but you're welcome nonetheless!

Also, the icon fits so well =D

[erinptah]

I did not realize I would like attempted!Dom!Rimmer this much.

"You're not so scary, are you?" - aww. (Someone, quick, teach Rimmer the difference between being in a scene and having a healthy relationship outside of it!)

[tsukinobun.livejournal.com]

oooh, yes, Dom!Rimmer is totty, totty, totty.

*sigh* if only Lister could have silent revelations. alas, he went and said just about the only *wrong* thing.

i agree, rimmer needs someone to actually teach him about this stuff. 'course, who is there? if he had a better guide into his neurotic paraphilias, maybe he wouldn't be such a nutter.

[bobbybob87.livejournal.com]

damn this fic is so good!
I love the way you explore aspects of their characters not brought up that much in the canon and still make it believeable. The part about Rimmer's sexuality just seems to fit perfectly, and I actually feel a bit scared for Lister!
Oh and:
“On your knees, squire.”
Best. Line. Ever.

[tsukinobun.livejournal.com]

so great to hear that you're really liking it. <3

oh, lord, if Rimmer ever said to me, "On your knees, squire," I would be *compelled* to obey, don't you agree?

That or melt into a puddle of fangirl goo...

[neral-idazmi.livejournal.com]

Ooooooooooh :D I'm enjoying this a lot. Only wish I could think of something more coherent to say :)

[tsukinobun.livejournal.com]

any feedback is good feedback. especially "ooooooooh."
;)
glad you're enjoying it!

[alyeen1.livejournal.com]

thinking about Lister kissing him did more than swell his ego
*giggle*

What a wonderful fellatio scene *melts*
Can't wait for the "naughtier" stuff to come ... :-)

... Now I only pointed out the physical stuff ... ehm ... don't know how that happened ;-)
Really like Rimmer's thoughts, especially how it's important for him to have control over the situation.

[an-ardent-mind.livejournal.com]

That was fan-smegging-tastic

[felineranger.livejournal.com]

Gaaah...! So very very hot! Must...have...more!

[randysugardandy.livejournal.com]

"Anyone able to wank was well enough to report for duty"

I nearly pee'd i think you have raised wanking puns to a new greater standard. oh and

HOThotHOThot aw im loving DOM!Rimmer mixed with a vulnarable one. more? *the begging eyes of doom*

[laurenthemself]

Can I ask for more of this as well as more of Imperfect Circle, or is that nagging? Because OMFG, Dom!Rimmer is one of my favourite things ever ever ever, just so you know.