Ficlet - Ace. Rimmer/Lister. PG
Mar. 23rd, 2006 01:27 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
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I dunno quite where this came from, but it came rather abruptly as one whole story. Spoilers for Polymorph II: Emohawk. I am always grateful for concrit.
"I'm not Ace Rimmer, Davey-boy."
"I'm not Ace Rimmer, Davey-boy."
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Date: 2006-03-23 11:45 am (UTC)It was as if he had owned a car for all of his life, and had just finally discovered what the wiper blades would do.
I love this metaphore.
Lister grabbed his arm and pulled him towards the sleeping quarters, betraying nervousness.
*swoons at the images of nervous Lister*
"Didn't think I had it in me, old chum?" Rimmer asked with a smile.
This is very good - emphasising that A: this isn't actually Ace, or rather, not the original Ace - it's Rimmer's Ace potential. It's part of him.
I offered to meet him in my room, covered in curry paste, after he finished sewing Cat up. He acted like he was expectin' it."
Hurrah! *gets unreasonably excited and happy*
He slowly raised his fist and bit down on it, hard.
How Rimmer is this? Wonderful.
His light-bee gave off a resounding clonk as it bounced off of the wall, dragging him reluctantly back into the room.
Excellent! I like my
pornscience fiction to make sense!He hit the offending member hard, to teach it a lesson.
Oh dear...
This made me really happy, for some reason. Probably because it's good. ;)
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Date: 2006-03-24 12:00 am (UTC)I usually waffle a bit over the ending to my fics, but this one just came on as a whole, so my issue was more filling out the details in getting from how I knew I wanted it to start to how I knew I wanted it to end. :p Glad you liked it!
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Date: 2006-03-23 10:57 pm (UTC)I really love all your fics.
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Date: 2006-03-23 11:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-23 11:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-23 11:56 pm (UTC)And - jebus tapdancing christ, I don't think you could write anything more blatantly jealous than Dimension Jump! Rimmer spends the whole time sniping at Ace - and not just plain sniping, but very specifically sniping at the attraction (in his jealous little mind) between Lister and Ace. Yeah, we all know that he was the one who wanted to be playing Spot The Submarine with Lister... :D
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Date: 2006-03-23 11:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-23 11:10 pm (UTC)I really liked this one =) The end made me giggle!
Good work matey =)
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Date: 2006-03-23 11:52 pm (UTC)You know I'm no big fan of Ace either... but I wanted to work a little bit with the differences between Ace and Arn-as-Ace. I didn't like the ending of Stoke Me A Clipper, but one bit I did like is when Lister tells Rimmer that he can be a different kind of Ace; that it's up to him. In the little pamphlet that comes with the VII DVD, it mentiones how Emohawk is a foreshadowing of Stoke; I thought, why not in that aspect, too?
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Date: 2006-03-26 01:01 am (UTC)But other than that:
The contrast between Arn-as-Ace Arn and normal Arn is fantastic, you've really captured the difference in the whole tone of your writing.
"I don't want to say anything about my other selves - it just seems a bit impolite - but I believe I'm a bit less arrogant than the Ace you met. Not that he didn't have good reason to be full of himself," Rimmer added hastily. "Hell of a chap." - Hee! - and Rimmer was highly annoyed to note that one part of his body was very much enjoying his mental rehash of the previous night's events. He hit the offending member hard, to teach it a lesson. - Both are genius.
this suctioned Rimmer - this designation is perhaps the best one ever.
I'm fascinated by Ace: every incarnation of him, and this is a really great piece of characterisation.
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Date: 2006-03-26 01:15 am (UTC)I agree - I'll make that change.